1 00:00:02,000 --> 00:00:07,000 Downloaded from YTS.MX 2 00:00:08,000 --> 00:00:13,000 Official YIFY movies site: YTS.MX 3 00:00:23,868 --> 00:00:25,995 [bells jingling] 4 00:00:35,337 --> 00:00:38,382 - [giggling] - There. That's better. 5 00:00:38,549 --> 00:00:40,760 [♪ Seals and Crofts: "Summer Breeze"] 6 00:00:43,220 --> 00:00:44,472 All clean. 7 00:00:48,559 --> 00:00:49,685 [sighs] 8 00:00:51,437 --> 00:00:54,732 ♪ He sees you when you're sleepin' He knows when you're awake 9 00:00:54,899 --> 00:00:56,150 What are you doing here? 10 00:00:56,317 --> 00:00:59,862 - And what are you talking about? - I'm talkin' about Santa Claus! 11 00:01:00,029 --> 00:01:03,282 Only 159 days left till Christmas, so you better be good. 12 00:01:03,449 --> 00:01:07,203 I'd better be good? How 'bout this? You better be scarce. Now go on. 13 00:01:07,369 --> 00:01:09,205 I don't care about Christmas. 14 00:01:14,877 --> 00:01:17,379 ♪ Jingle bells, jingle bells Jingle all the way 15 00:01:17,546 --> 00:01:19,465 - Donkey! - Only 51 days till Christmas. 16 00:01:19,632 --> 00:01:22,009 Get your green butt in gear and get marshmallows 17 00:01:22,176 --> 00:01:25,304 because without marshmallows, sweet potatoes are nothin'! 18 00:01:25,471 --> 00:01:29,683 [groans] Enough! I don't care about any of this nonsense. 19 00:01:29,850 --> 00:01:30,851 Now shoo! 20 00:01:31,018 --> 00:01:33,270 OK. But don't say I didn't say I told you so. 21 00:01:38,651 --> 00:01:41,362 ♪ Smashing through the snow And laughin' all the way 22 00:01:41,529 --> 00:01:44,448 [laughing] It's finally here. Tomorrow's Christmas Eve! 23 00:01:44,615 --> 00:01:45,574 - Everything ready? - No. 24 00:01:45,741 --> 00:01:49,703 You haven't trimmed stockings, hung your chestnuts, roasted the tree? 25 00:01:49,870 --> 00:01:53,332 - Or figgified your puddin'? - Donkey! Get it through your head. 26 00:01:53,499 --> 00:01:56,794 No one here gives a hoot about Christmas! 27 00:01:56,961 --> 00:01:59,797 A white Christmas! Oh, how perfect. 28 00:01:59,964 --> 00:02:03,509 And it's our first one together as a family. Isn't this exciting? 29 00:02:03,676 --> 00:02:06,178 Oh, yeah! How 'bout that? 30 00:02:06,345 --> 00:02:08,264 There's somethin' Shrek needs to... 31 00:02:08,430 --> 00:02:10,599 Don't ruin the surprise for her, Donkey. 32 00:02:10,766 --> 00:02:13,644 Surprise? Oh, I love surprises! 33 00:02:13,811 --> 00:02:16,981 You're the best. Come on, let's go make some cookies. 34 00:02:17,148 --> 00:02:18,274 [door closes] 35 00:02:18,440 --> 00:02:20,693 OK, you a dead man. You know that? 36 00:02:20,860 --> 00:02:22,862 Hold that thought. I'll be right back. 37 00:02:23,028 --> 00:02:27,533 [♪ Harry Gregson-Williams: "O Fortuna from Carmina Burana"] 38 00:02:45,092 --> 00:02:47,178 Oh, good. You're still open. 39 00:02:47,344 --> 00:02:50,347 No, no. We're closing now. Merry Christmas. 40 00:02:50,514 --> 00:02:53,517 Wait! I need your help. I have to make a Christmas, 41 00:02:53,684 --> 00:02:56,228 and I have no idea what it is or how to do it! 42 00:02:56,395 --> 00:02:58,355 Why didn't you say so? That's super. 43 00:02:58,522 --> 00:03:01,192 I know all about Christmas, and I've just the book. 44 00:03:01,358 --> 00:03:04,320 Christmas for Village Idiots. It's all spelled out. See? 45 00:03:04,486 --> 00:03:06,989 One, decorate house. Two, stockings by the fireplace. 46 00:03:07,156 --> 00:03:09,408 Step three, the Christmas feast. Mmm! 47 00:03:09,575 --> 00:03:12,036 - What's that? - Step four? The Christmas tree! 48 00:03:12,203 --> 00:03:14,038 The tree goes inside the house? 49 00:03:14,538 --> 00:03:18,500 Anyway, step five, the telling of the Christmas story. 50 00:03:18,667 --> 00:03:21,253 It's the step that says I created the perfect Christmas 51 00:03:21,420 --> 00:03:24,131 for my perfect family perfectly. Family by the fire, 52 00:03:24,298 --> 00:03:26,634 everyone cozy and warm. Happy, happy. Voila! 53 00:03:26,800 --> 00:03:29,136 - Sure. - Long story short, 54 00:03:29,303 --> 00:03:31,180 it's all right here. It's no problem. 55 00:03:31,347 --> 00:03:33,891 - Oh, perfect. - I mean, how hard can it be? 56 00:03:34,058 --> 00:03:37,144 - I didn't get the eggnog! - Closed?! What do you mean? 57 00:03:37,311 --> 00:03:39,521 Dwight the Knight action figure? 58 00:03:39,688 --> 00:03:41,732 Sweet potatoes are nothing without marshmallows! 59 00:03:41,899 --> 00:03:45,569 - Bye-bye. Have a super Christmas. - [groans] 60 00:03:46,362 --> 00:03:49,448 - [object rattling, thudding] - [gasps] 61 00:03:52,409 --> 00:03:54,870 - [Shrek gasping] Aah... - Honey, is that you? 62 00:03:55,871 --> 00:03:59,124 Oh, Fiona! What are you doing up so early? 63 00:03:59,291 --> 00:04:00,251 [grunts] 64 00:04:00,417 --> 00:04:02,962 - Are you OK? - I'm all right. 65 00:04:03,128 --> 00:04:05,422 - What are you...? - I... 66 00:04:05,589 --> 00:04:07,424 Are you decorating? 67 00:04:07,591 --> 00:04:11,136 - Uh... Yeah, that. Surprised? - Yes. [chuckles] 68 00:04:11,303 --> 00:04:14,598 Well, this is our first Christmas together as a family, 69 00:04:14,765 --> 00:04:17,935 and, you know, I just want to make sure that it's perfect. 70 00:04:18,102 --> 00:04:21,105 Shrek, I think... it's beautiful. 71 00:04:21,272 --> 00:04:23,107 - It's passable. - It's horrible! 72 00:04:23,274 --> 00:04:25,609 - Donkey! - They usually toilet paper and run. 73 00:04:25,776 --> 00:04:28,445 Whoever did this means business! Get rid of all this 74 00:04:28,612 --> 00:04:30,572 and get tinsel and doilies and ribbons 75 00:04:30,739 --> 00:04:32,116 and some plastic reindeer. 76 00:04:32,283 --> 00:04:34,118 What is it you wanted today? 77 00:04:34,285 --> 00:04:37,329 It's Christmas Eve! I've brought you a little somethin'. 78 00:04:37,496 --> 00:04:40,332 Go ahead, take a couple. I bought plenty for everybody! 79 00:04:40,499 --> 00:04:43,127 Oh! Isn't that... nice. 80 00:04:43,294 --> 00:04:47,673 Well, thanks for stopping by for that brief visit, but as you can see, 81 00:04:47,840 --> 00:04:49,466 there's a lot of work to do. 82 00:04:49,633 --> 00:04:51,635 Just like him to wait till last minute. 83 00:04:51,802 --> 00:04:54,430 Don't worry, the one thing I know is Christmas. 84 00:04:54,596 --> 00:04:57,516 He's gonna want help, advice, and he's definitely... 85 00:04:57,683 --> 00:05:02,604 Actually, I think what he really wants is a nice family Christmas. 86 00:05:02,771 --> 00:05:06,108 Oh, a family Christmas. 87 00:05:06,275 --> 00:05:08,193 Yeah. It's the first one with the kids. 88 00:05:08,360 --> 00:05:10,696 Don't say a word. I know exactly what you mean. 89 00:05:10,863 --> 00:05:13,282 I got a lot to do now, so I better get movin'. 90 00:05:13,449 --> 00:05:15,701 Thank you, Donkey! And Merry Christmas! 91 00:05:15,868 --> 00:05:17,369 All right. Merry Christmas! 92 00:05:17,536 --> 00:05:21,290 ♪ Love and joy come to you and to me some waffles too 93 00:05:22,958 --> 00:05:25,502 Donkey's right. It's Christmas Eve. 94 00:05:25,669 --> 00:05:28,297 How am I ever gonna get this done in time? 95 00:05:28,464 --> 00:05:30,674 This is gonna be the best Christmas ever. 96 00:05:30,841 --> 00:05:33,135 And we're going to do it together, so come on. 97 00:05:33,302 --> 00:05:35,804 [♪ The Waitresses: "Christmas Wrapping"] 98 00:05:39,516 --> 00:05:41,018 [burps] 99 00:05:48,359 --> 00:05:49,360 [chortling] 100 00:05:57,534 --> 00:05:59,703 Everything looks so good! 101 00:05:59,870 --> 00:06:04,541 - Oh, nice job, honey. - Well, we all did it together. 102 00:06:04,708 --> 00:06:07,920 What would the perfect Christmas be without a Christmas story? 103 00:06:08,087 --> 00:06:09,713 - [giggling] - Ahem. 104 00:06:09,880 --> 00:06:14,051 'Twas the night before Christmas and all through the house 105 00:06:14,218 --> 00:06:17,012 - Not a creature was stirring... - [door slams open] 106 00:06:17,179 --> 00:06:19,264 - What? - Merry Christmas, Shrek! 107 00:06:19,431 --> 00:06:22,351 - Oh, not you! - We're here to smother you with love! 108 00:06:22,518 --> 00:06:25,187 Absolutely not! Bad Donkey! Go home! 109 00:06:25,354 --> 00:06:27,564 How are you gonna have Christmas without family? 110 00:06:27,731 --> 00:06:29,608 - Seasons greeting! - Happy Holidays! 111 00:06:29,775 --> 00:06:31,693 - Merry Christmas! - What a nice surprise! 112 00:06:31,860 --> 00:06:33,237 Oh, yeah. 113 00:06:34,571 --> 00:06:36,115 [all giggling] 114 00:06:36,281 --> 00:06:39,743 OK, I will assume the position. 115 00:06:39,910 --> 00:06:42,538 - [yowling] - [laughing] 116 00:06:42,704 --> 00:06:47,292 - I am the joy-filled swine! - Yay, for the season of love! 117 00:06:47,459 --> 00:06:50,921 This is where Christmas stockings go. You can't hang laundry up! 118 00:06:51,088 --> 00:06:53,132 Donkey! Don't touch anything. 119 00:06:53,924 --> 00:06:56,760 How we gonna roast chestnuts on this little bitty fire? 120 00:06:56,927 --> 00:06:58,053 Hey, baby, you mind? 121 00:07:02,099 --> 00:07:04,893 - [Gingerbread Man] Oh, boy! - [Mouse] This way, gents. 122 00:07:05,060 --> 00:07:06,937 [shrieks] That was our supper! 123 00:07:08,439 --> 00:07:09,773 Ow! Hey! 124 00:07:11,942 --> 00:07:14,987 Did you hurt yourself when you fell out of heaven? 125 00:07:15,154 --> 00:07:17,489 - Where are we going to put it? - I don't know. 126 00:07:17,656 --> 00:07:18,824 Let's put it over here. 127 00:07:18,991 --> 00:07:20,659 No, that is not with the feng shui. 128 00:07:20,826 --> 00:07:22,619 Come on, everybody, let's dance! 129 00:07:22,786 --> 00:07:25,956 [dance music plays] 130 00:07:30,002 --> 00:07:32,004 - [muffled music] - [laughter] 131 00:07:34,131 --> 00:07:38,844 - [Shrek] Occupied! - It's me. Shrek? 132 00:07:39,011 --> 00:07:42,306 - Yes? - Come back to the party. Please? 133 00:07:42,473 --> 00:07:44,892 Mmm. I don't think that'd be such a good idea. 134 00:07:45,058 --> 00:07:48,645 Come on. It's not that bad. 135 00:07:48,812 --> 00:07:51,607 OK, I know you're not a party person, but... 136 00:07:51,773 --> 00:07:55,068 But what? This is not the kind of Christmas I had in mind. 137 00:07:55,235 --> 00:07:57,905 They're our friends, Shrek. They all mean well. 138 00:07:58,071 --> 00:07:59,031 [plate shatters] 139 00:07:59,198 --> 00:08:01,658 - [pig] How many babies did Fiona have? - [pig 2] She has babies? 140 00:08:01,825 --> 00:08:04,369 - [pig] I don't know. - Better get back to the house. 141 00:08:04,536 --> 00:08:06,330 Surprised we have a house to go back to. 142 00:08:06,497 --> 00:08:09,791 - Are you coming? - Oh, I can hardly wait. 143 00:08:09,958 --> 00:08:11,710 Ah! Finally! 144 00:08:11,877 --> 00:08:14,713 [thudding] 145 00:08:19,009 --> 00:08:21,303 - [hums Ride of the Valkyries] - Look at him go! 146 00:08:21,470 --> 00:08:23,222 Excuse me! Excuse me! 147 00:08:23,388 --> 00:08:28,101 - Excuse you for what? - I don't feel very good. 148 00:08:28,268 --> 00:08:32,564 - I feel better now. - Ooh, a chocolate chip! 149 00:08:32,731 --> 00:08:35,484 - Mmm. - Sweetheart? [giggles] 150 00:08:35,651 --> 00:08:38,153 [♪ Journey: "Don't Stop Believin"'] 151 00:08:38,779 --> 00:08:40,155 Mind if I cut in? 152 00:08:40,322 --> 00:08:44,076 ♪ Don't stop believing 153 00:08:45,536 --> 00:08:48,413 ♪ Up and down the boulevard 154 00:08:48,789 --> 00:08:51,083 [giggling, cooing] 155 00:08:51,250 --> 00:08:53,418 I am a little Christmas angel! 156 00:08:53,585 --> 00:08:55,462 Hey there, my sweeties. 157 00:08:55,629 --> 00:08:57,714 - [burps] - Aww. 158 00:08:57,881 --> 00:09:01,260 Would you like Daddy to finish the story for you? 159 00:09:01,426 --> 00:09:02,553 - [squeals] - Yeah? 160 00:09:02,719 --> 00:09:05,430 The children were nestled all snug in their beds 161 00:09:05,597 --> 00:09:08,850 - While visions of sugarplums... - Were you tellin' 'em 162 00:09:09,017 --> 00:09:11,895 The Night Before Christmas? Best Christmas story ever! 163 00:09:12,062 --> 00:09:14,022 - I'm the best teller ever! - Donkey... 164 00:09:14,189 --> 00:09:16,024 I got it committed to memorization! 165 00:09:16,191 --> 00:09:17,818 - Gather round! - Donkey! Wait! 166 00:09:17,985 --> 00:09:20,195 I'm supposed to tell the Christmas story. 167 00:09:20,362 --> 00:09:23,240 'Twas the night before Christmas and I spent all the day 168 00:09:23,407 --> 00:09:26,201 Finishin' up on my Christmas display 169 00:09:26,368 --> 00:09:28,870 Now, missin' all this would be nothin' but tragic 170 00:09:29,037 --> 00:09:31,707 So just follow me and I'll show you the magic 171 00:09:31,873 --> 00:09:33,959 Now, out in the yard in a glorious clutter 172 00:09:34,126 --> 00:09:36,837 Is a spectacle there that'll make your heart flutter 173 00:09:37,004 --> 00:09:40,173 With 20-foot cheese balls and a big eggnog fountain 174 00:09:40,340 --> 00:09:42,593 And yodelin' elves on an ambrosia mountain 175 00:09:42,759 --> 00:09:45,178 A stage where acrobats jump, leap and prance 176 00:09:45,345 --> 00:09:48,056 And honor the day through interpretive dance 177 00:09:48,223 --> 00:09:49,182 [all shout] 178 00:09:49,349 --> 00:09:51,685 Just when you think the display is complete 179 00:09:51,852 --> 00:09:54,354 The Christmas parade comes right down the street 180 00:09:54,521 --> 00:09:56,773 With holiday floats all in silver and blue 181 00:09:56,940 --> 00:09:59,901 With sugarplum fairies and a reindeer or two 182 00:10:00,068 --> 00:10:02,821 There's a baton-twirlin' snowman all happy and perky 183 00:10:02,988 --> 00:10:05,699 Magical peacocks and a dancin' roast turkey 184 00:10:05,866 --> 00:10:09,286 [♪ Carmen Carter: "Gonna Make You Sweat (Everybody Dance Now)"] 185 00:10:09,453 --> 00:10:12,539 [Donkey] And right when you think that you’ve just seen it all 186 00:10:12,706 --> 00:10:16,418 Comes a huge waffle Santa that's 50 feet tall 187 00:10:16,585 --> 00:10:19,004 Ho, ho, ho! 188 00:10:19,171 --> 00:10:21,882 With syrup and butter the sight just amazes 189 00:10:22,049 --> 00:10:24,760 As it's flanked by a choir all singin' his praises 190 00:10:24,926 --> 00:10:28,055 [♪ Harry Gregson-Williams and the Waffle Santa Chorus: "Hallelujah Chorus"] 191 00:10:32,976 --> 00:10:35,479 - Donkey. - Santa? 192 00:10:35,646 --> 00:10:36,813 - Donkey! - Santa! 193 00:10:36,980 --> 00:10:38,815 - Donkey! - Oh. 194 00:10:38,982 --> 00:10:42,110 Very inappropriate, amigo. Please, allow me. 195 00:10:42,277 --> 00:10:44,655 - Oh, Puss, not you too. - [Puss] In my homeland, 196 00:10:44,821 --> 00:10:47,658 we tell a very different tale of the Santa Nicholas. 197 00:10:47,824 --> 00:10:50,077 He's not made of waffles. 198 00:10:50,243 --> 00:10:53,372 This Santa was suave He was nothing like that 199 00:10:53,538 --> 00:10:57,668 The Santa I know was a hot Latin cat 200 00:10:57,834 --> 00:11:01,755 He was dressed all in fur from his head to his paws 201 00:11:01,922 --> 00:11:07,302 And he stood there heroic A real Santa... Claws 202 00:11:07,469 --> 00:11:09,930 Red are his boots 203 00:11:10,097 --> 00:11:12,849 - And so is his cape - [all] Olé! 204 00:11:13,016 --> 00:11:16,937 His sword is a cane that tastes like crab cake 205 00:11:17,104 --> 00:11:19,523 He wears a fine belt and a leather cravat 206 00:11:19,690 --> 00:11:24,194 And there's a cute fuzzy thing which hangs down from his hat 207 00:11:25,070 --> 00:11:27,489 [bell jingles] 208 00:11:30,075 --> 00:11:32,160 [purring] 209 00:11:33,370 --> 00:11:34,746 [crickets chirping] 210 00:11:34,913 --> 00:11:37,416 I have shamed myself. 211 00:11:37,582 --> 00:11:39,710 - [all] Olé! - All right, everybody, 212 00:11:39,876 --> 00:11:42,629 if you leave now, you can beat the holiday traffic. 213 00:11:42,796 --> 00:11:45,632 Aw, phooey with all your sunshine and lollipops! 214 00:11:45,799 --> 00:11:49,177 Where I come from, Christmas is a nightmare. 215 00:11:49,344 --> 00:11:51,513 - [sighs] - [clears throat] 216 00:11:51,680 --> 00:11:54,933 'Twas the night before Christmas and the prettiest sights 217 00:11:55,100 --> 00:11:59,146 Were my sweetheart beside me in the bright Christmas lights 218 00:11:59,312 --> 00:12:00,897 ...until they got home. 219 00:12:01,064 --> 00:12:05,485 When they looked at the car door handle, and they found a hook! 220 00:12:05,652 --> 00:12:07,112 - [shrieking] - [laughing] 221 00:12:07,279 --> 00:12:10,198 Gingy, cut it out! You're really givin' me the creeps! 222 00:12:10,365 --> 00:12:13,160 Oh, come on, I was just teasin'. 223 00:12:13,326 --> 00:12:16,121 - Come here, you. - [giggles] 224 00:12:16,288 --> 00:12:18,290 Gingy, I couldn't stay mad at you. 225 00:12:18,457 --> 00:12:20,000 - [rustling] - What was that? 226 00:12:20,167 --> 00:12:22,753 Oh, no, you don't. I'm not fallin' for that again. 227 00:12:22,919 --> 00:12:26,006 No, I'm really, really seriously not kidding. 228 00:12:27,674 --> 00:12:29,801 - Whoa! - Oh, Gingy! 229 00:12:29,968 --> 00:12:32,304 - [roaring] - [yelling] 230 00:12:36,183 --> 00:12:38,977 Suzie! 231 00:12:39,895 --> 00:12:42,397 - [crunching] - No! No! No! 232 00:12:42,564 --> 00:12:45,150 That's the most ridiculous thing I've ever heard. 233 00:12:45,317 --> 00:12:47,569 - That's not how it goes. - You weren't there! 234 00:12:47,736 --> 00:12:50,906 All right, everyone, I've had just about enough! 235 00:12:51,072 --> 00:12:55,243 All I wanted was a nice Christmas with my family. 236 00:12:55,410 --> 00:12:59,539 That's exactly why we're all here! Come on, let's finish tellin' my story. 237 00:12:59,706 --> 00:13:04,252 No, Donkey, that's not what I meant. And get out of my chair. 238 00:13:04,920 --> 00:13:08,173 - Hey, what's this? - Donkey, let go of the book. 239 00:13:08,340 --> 00:13:12,385 - Why are you whisperin'? - I'm not kiddin'. Give me the book! 240 00:13:17,349 --> 00:13:18,350 - Heimlich! - Ja? 241 00:13:18,517 --> 00:13:20,227 - No, Heimlich! - Oh, ja! 242 00:13:20,393 --> 00:13:21,394 Ay! 243 00:13:21,561 --> 00:13:23,814 [grunts] Whoa! 244 00:13:25,232 --> 00:13:28,276 - [squealing] - Oh! My eye! 245 00:13:28,902 --> 00:13:30,278 [screaming] 246 00:13:30,445 --> 00:13:31,822 - [shouting] - [giggling] 247 00:13:38,119 --> 00:13:39,538 Stop, drop and roll, Shrek! 248 00:13:39,704 --> 00:13:41,748 - Somebody get some water! - I got it! 249 00:13:41,915 --> 00:13:44,626 Don't worry, Shrek, everything is under control! 250 00:13:44,793 --> 00:13:46,294 Oh, boy. 251 00:13:46,461 --> 00:13:49,256 [kettle whistling] 252 00:13:49,422 --> 00:13:51,758 - Oh! The tea is ready. - [Shrek] Out! 253 00:13:51,925 --> 00:13:56,012 I want everybody out of my house right now! 254 00:13:57,222 --> 00:13:59,349 Aah! 255 00:13:59,641 --> 00:14:03,186 Well, that's a real nice way to treat your guests on Christmas! 256 00:14:03,353 --> 00:14:08,358 And if you think I'm gonna give you a present now, you are sadly mistaken! 257 00:14:08,525 --> 00:14:10,944 You want to give me a present? Then go away! 258 00:14:11,111 --> 00:14:14,030 - That's all I wanted! - Fine! I'm going! 259 00:14:14,197 --> 00:14:15,448 Good, then go! 260 00:14:15,615 --> 00:14:19,286 You go and have yourself a merry Christmas. 261 00:14:19,452 --> 00:14:23,039 - Ebenezer Shrek! - And a "bah, humbug" to you too! 262 00:14:27,544 --> 00:14:30,630 - We could come to our house. - Ja, we have plenty of schnitzel. 263 00:14:30,797 --> 00:14:33,008 Now maybe we can... 264 00:14:34,134 --> 00:14:37,846 Fiona? Where you going? 265 00:14:38,013 --> 00:14:41,516 Shrek, you just kicked everybody out on Christmas. 266 00:14:41,683 --> 00:14:44,060 Well, that wasn't Christmas. That was chaos! 267 00:14:44,227 --> 00:14:47,063 Look, I know it didn't go like you wanted. 268 00:14:47,230 --> 00:14:51,026 What I wanted was a perfect Christmas for me and my family. 269 00:14:51,192 --> 00:14:53,737 - That was our family. - You call that a family? 270 00:14:53,904 --> 00:14:55,989 That was a natural disaster! 271 00:14:56,156 --> 00:14:58,992 On Christmas, that's how it works. Yes, it was crowded. 272 00:14:59,159 --> 00:15:01,161 Yes, it got a little out of hand. 273 00:15:01,328 --> 00:15:04,539 - Fiona, they lit me on fire! - Shrek... 274 00:15:04,706 --> 00:15:09,252 I had everything under control until they showed up and ruined my Christmas! 275 00:15:09,419 --> 00:15:12,672 - Your Christmas? - I mean our Christmas. 276 00:15:12,839 --> 00:15:15,342 For you, and the babies. 277 00:15:15,508 --> 00:15:20,555 [sighs] Christmas is not just about you or me. Or even the babies. 278 00:15:22,057 --> 00:15:23,767 You just don't get it. 279 00:15:23,934 --> 00:15:29,105 I have to go. I need to apologize to our friends. 280 00:15:29,272 --> 00:15:31,274 Fiona, wait. 281 00:15:44,454 --> 00:15:47,582 [♪ Eels: "The Stars Shine in the Sky Tonight"] 282 00:16:19,406 --> 00:16:22,325 I don't understand why Shrek had to be so mean and cranky. 283 00:16:22,492 --> 00:16:24,327 We were tryin' to do what you wanted! 284 00:16:24,494 --> 00:16:27,414 - What're you talking about? - What you said this morning. 285 00:16:27,580 --> 00:16:30,208 You and Shrek wanted to have a big family Christmas. 286 00:16:30,375 --> 00:16:33,211 I said it was our first Christmas together as a family. 287 00:16:33,378 --> 00:16:37,340 Right. That's me and everybody else. Then he lost his temper like that. 288 00:16:37,507 --> 00:16:40,719 You know, Donkey, none of us really asked Shrek what he wanted. 289 00:16:40,885 --> 00:16:44,806 I must agree with the Princess. And you, especially, were no Christmas angel. 290 00:16:44,973 --> 00:16:47,851 - I don't remember askin' you anything! - Donkey. 291 00:16:48,018 --> 00:16:50,520 I'm sorry, Princess. You're right. 292 00:16:50,687 --> 00:16:53,356 - Still, Shrek didn't have to be so... - [Shrek] What? 293 00:16:53,523 --> 00:16:54,733 - [yelling] - [meowing] 294 00:16:54,899 --> 00:16:57,235 Pigheaded? Stubborn? Mean? 295 00:16:57,402 --> 00:17:02,282 Well, maybe I am all those things, but I'm an ogre, OK? 296 00:17:02,449 --> 00:17:05,118 So here's the thing. [clears throat] 297 00:17:05,285 --> 00:17:08,955 I'm sorry you took getting kicked out of my house the wrong way. 298 00:17:09,122 --> 00:17:12,876 No, wait. What I meant to say is 299 00:17:13,043 --> 00:17:16,963 I know you're just trying to be helpful in your irritating fashion... 300 00:17:17,130 --> 00:17:21,301 - Ay, caramba! - Some people can't help being annoying. 301 00:17:21,468 --> 00:17:24,554 - Shrek! - Look, 302 00:17:24,721 --> 00:17:26,765 I shouldn't have lost my temper. 303 00:17:26,931 --> 00:17:29,768 - Apology accepted. Let's go eat. - Wait a minute. 304 00:17:29,934 --> 00:17:32,771 There's somethin' more to this. Come on, what's goin' on? 305 00:17:32,937 --> 00:17:37,567 Look, all I wanted was to make this perfect for my family, 306 00:17:37,734 --> 00:17:41,780 but I don't even know what Christmas means. 307 00:17:41,946 --> 00:17:45,283 The thing is, this is my first Christmas too. 308 00:17:46,576 --> 00:17:49,662 Whoa! Hold up, Shrek! You mean that you never had... 309 00:17:49,829 --> 00:17:50,830 - No. - Not even one? 310 00:17:50,997 --> 00:17:52,457 - No! - You mean no chestnuts, 311 00:17:52,624 --> 00:17:54,501 no Santa, no presents, no stockings? 312 00:17:54,667 --> 00:17:56,836 - No nut cakes?! - Donkey! 313 00:17:57,003 --> 00:18:00,298 No, none of that. 314 00:18:00,465 --> 00:18:03,843 Ogres don't celebrate Christmas. 315 00:18:04,511 --> 00:18:07,138 Ogres don't celebrate anything. 316 00:18:09,933 --> 00:18:12,602 Oh, man, now I'm all emotional. 317 00:18:12,769 --> 00:18:15,772 - Come here, gimme a hug! - All right, that's close enough. 318 00:18:15,939 --> 00:18:18,483 OK, all right, I just... guess I got... a little 319 00:18:18,650 --> 00:18:21,820 excited about Christmas and all the presents and mistletoe 320 00:18:21,986 --> 00:18:24,989 and everything, and I forgot that it's... 321 00:18:25,156 --> 00:18:28,827 It's about us all bein' together, and I'm... I'm sorry, Shrek. 322 00:18:28,993 --> 00:18:32,997 I know, Donkey, and... and I'm sorry it ended up in a great big fight. 323 00:18:33,164 --> 00:18:34,707 Christmas is all about fights. 324 00:18:34,874 --> 00:18:38,503 My mama used to say, "Christmas ain't Christmas till somebody cries." 325 00:18:38,670 --> 00:18:40,213 Usually that someone's me. 326 00:18:40,380 --> 00:18:43,133 There is no right way to do Christmas. You just do it. 327 00:18:43,299 --> 00:18:44,676 [all] Ja, with schnitzel! 328 00:18:44,843 --> 00:18:46,678 - And eggnog! - [all] And cheese! 329 00:18:46,845 --> 00:18:51,057 - And family. - Yeah. And family. 330 00:18:51,224 --> 00:18:55,353 So despite the fact that you drive me crazy at times... 331 00:18:55,520 --> 00:18:58,064 Yes, Donkey, I'm lookin' at you. 332 00:18:58,231 --> 00:19:02,902 ...it would mean a lot to me if you'd all come back and join us. 333 00:19:04,529 --> 00:19:07,365 OK, I guess I deserved that. 334 00:19:07,532 --> 00:19:09,075 All right, don't push your luck. 335 00:19:09,242 --> 00:19:12,162 [laughing] They got you good, Shrek! 336 00:19:12,328 --> 00:19:14,205 That wasn't even funny! Who did that? 337 00:19:14,372 --> 00:19:16,040 [babies cooing] 338 00:19:17,542 --> 00:19:20,336 [Fiona] Well, that's the last of the spare blankets. 339 00:19:22,589 --> 00:19:26,759 Sorry, but this is my spot. I never get the good spots, so I specifically... 340 00:19:28,553 --> 00:19:31,723 So we are pigs, pigs in the blanket, ja? 341 00:19:31,890 --> 00:19:33,183 - Ja. - Ja. 342 00:19:33,349 --> 00:19:35,560 - This is funny then, ja? - Ja, ja. 343 00:19:35,727 --> 00:19:36,895 - This is funny. - Ja. 344 00:19:37,061 --> 00:19:39,689 - Yep, that's a good one. - Good night, everyone. 345 00:19:39,856 --> 00:19:42,692 - It's time for lights out. - We can't go to sleep yet. 346 00:19:42,859 --> 00:19:45,069 We haven't heard a bedtime story. Right? 347 00:19:45,236 --> 00:19:46,237 Shrek, yeah! 348 00:19:46,404 --> 00:19:49,908 - [all chattering indistinctly] - All right. All right. 349 00:19:51,618 --> 00:19:53,036 Don't need this. 350 00:19:53,203 --> 00:19:54,913 - [giggling] - OK. 351 00:19:56,581 --> 00:20:02,045 'Twas the night before Christmas Not a swamp rat did creep 352 00:20:02,212 --> 00:20:04,964 As mother and babe played kazoo in their sleep 353 00:20:05,131 --> 00:20:06,925 [kazoo sounds] 354 00:20:07,217 --> 00:20:10,595 Now, the sight of the house would make any ogre droop 355 00:20:10,762 --> 00:20:14,140 For 'twas sickeningly sweet as unicorn poop 356 00:20:14,307 --> 00:20:17,769 Yet who was arriving to help this lost cause? 357 00:20:17,936 --> 00:20:22,607 The foul, the vile and handsome Ogre Claus 358 00:20:22,774 --> 00:20:24,150 Hey. How's it goin'? 359 00:20:24,317 --> 00:20:26,986 He looked all around and scratched at his beard 360 00:20:27,153 --> 00:20:28,947 And said... 361 00:20:29,113 --> 00:20:31,407 And said... 362 00:20:31,574 --> 00:20:34,953 This place is worse than I thought... Uh, feared. 363 00:20:35,119 --> 00:20:38,289 So he grabbed up his belly and screwed up his face 364 00:20:38,456 --> 00:20:41,292 - And let loose a... - [loud belch] 365 00:20:41,834 --> 00:20:43,836 That transformed the place 366 00:20:44,003 --> 00:20:47,131 With a gleam in his eye his work here was done 367 00:20:47,298 --> 00:20:50,468 And then to the babies he gave one by one 368 00:20:50,635 --> 00:20:53,471 A festering bottle of stinky swamp juice 369 00:20:53,638 --> 00:20:57,141 And for mommy a kiss and a good Christmas goose 370 00:20:57,308 --> 00:21:00,311 Four hundred twenty five degrees, 20 minutes per pound. 371 00:21:00,478 --> 00:21:03,648 Then digging a finger inside of his nose 372 00:21:03,815 --> 00:21:07,986 And giving a nod up the chimney he rose 373 00:21:08,152 --> 00:21:11,990 And I heard him exclaim as he drove out of sight 374 00:21:12,156 --> 00:21:17,620 "Smelly Christmas to all and to all a gross night" 375 00:21:18,371 --> 00:21:22,000 - [bells jingling] - [Ogre Claus] Ho, ho, ho! 376 00:21:22,166 --> 00:21:24,043 Ho, ho, ho! 377 00:21:24,210 --> 00:21:27,880 - Ho, ho, ho! - Santa?! [screams] 378 00:21:28,214 --> 00:21:36,214 Ho, ho, ho!